2015 Collection: Sporadic Notes From The Toy Factory #16

June 9, 2022 Notes on Aging: Things Your Parents Never Told You.

(Page 1 missing.)

... was that while his nose grew larger on the outside of his face, it also grew larger on the inside of his face, and therein developed, as I have, a labyrinth of fluted cavities for nasal debris and secretions to alight; to affix to; to secure upon; to linger, that weren't there a few short years ago.

What used to take less than a few seconds to vacate with reasonable assurance that I had removed or expelled said obstruction, either by protrusion of a singular exploratory digit using handkerchief or toilet paper; or the more grotesque forcible nasal expulsion has become a virtual minefield of antagonism, as I now have to constantly examine my nasal orifices carefully, practically turning my nostrils inside out, in order to locate and remove hangers-on, hiders, new forestations of nasal-wall lichen and fungi; soil-laced chunks, sawdust, soot, bark, or bugs that have taken refuse there.

Note: Must warn daughter.

Comments

Joe - Wednesday's Child said…

Especially before any encounter with a child. They're morbidly fascinated by adult boogers, nose hairs, ear hair, and other grotesqueries of human aging.

Did you know that your nose and ear cartilage will continue to grow for some hours after you kick the bucket?

April 7, 2022 at 9:56 AM

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